The Omaha Critic

Well, they’ve done it.  The Junior Critics have pestered me for their own site to tinker with based solely on the opinions of kids.  So, in the coming weeks I will either incorporate kids reviews into this site or launch a sister to this regarding kid food critics.  My oldest has it in her head that the cleanliness of the bathroom dictates the flavor of the food.  She’s going to have so much fun.

 

Well, I’m going to go plan out my next master plan.  Good ngiht, and good eating!

 

~The Omaha Critic

A little more history on your favorite critic:  I grew up in South Texas.  When I was there I had access to some pretty darn tasty Mexican food.  I moved to Omaha a while ago and have been hard pressed to get good Mexican food.  Only a few places I have been to, can really capture the right flavor.  I think I may have another place to add to that very short list. 

Several days ago I received a request to try San Diego Taco from the owner.  I have to be honest, it was my first invite.  I didn’t know how to really handle it.  Do I announce myself or do I just kick back and see what happens.  I opted for kicking back.  So?  Now what?  Oh yeah… review. 

San Diego Taco is located just east of 108th on Mockingbird drive in a small strip mall.  It’s next to the nail salon.  It’s hard to spot, but worth the search.

The first thing I need to say is that the website’s address doesn’t reflect anything about San Diego Taco.  That’s a mistake.  Why do I say that?  I say that because we are a connected society, and people want to know about a place before they go.  Well… I guess that’s why I’m here. 

So, the website’s name is www.cateringbypaul.com, and the site doesn’t have any obvious references to San Diego Taco.  Ok… I’m a food critic, not a web design critic. 

I took the kids in and sat.  The place is VERY unassuming and the painted red floor was cute.  It looked to be an old clothing boutique and has a faux shingle roof hanging on the inside.  Kind of like Le Mesa on 108th but I don’t think it was intentional by the current owner.  I was a little worried when I walked in that this was going to be a disappointment.  That couldn’t have been farther from the truth.  Now, we took our seat and we were greeted and were offered drinks and chips and salsa.  The drinks were canned and the Chips and Salsa were like $1.75.  That kina cheesed me a little when I found out that they cost something, but quickly got over it when I began to mow through the chips and salsa.  It had a little more garlic than what I make, but I couldn’t stop eating it.  It was sooo good.  There were a couple of other bottles on the table as well.  A green/verde – lime sauce and another red chipotle sauce.  None of these were hot for me, but they had a great flavor.  The boys got chicken tacos, one daughter got a chicken burrito and the other got the carne asada taco.  As for me, I got the Friday night special: Two roasted cod tacos on flour tortillas with this lime-cream sauce and cabbage with a side of beans and rice.

So we get our food, and I look down at these two tacos and noticed how evenly the cabbage was sliced.  They were almost artistic.  They were two freaking tacos and I am sitting here focus on the cabbage.  I felt silly and picked them up and bit in.  Now understand, I have had fish tacos before and I had some predetermined flavor in my head for how these things were going to taste.  I bit into this thing and it shattered my preconceived notion of how this was going to taste.  The cod was so delicate but the flavor of the fish and the sauce just danced across my tongue like lightning.  I think the only words I could squeeze out for the first few minutes were ‘MMM!’ and ‘OH MY GOD!’  So rarely does a dish just capture me anymore.  I honestly got lost in the flavor of these things.  I was thinking about putting the verde on them, I am so glad I never made that mistake.  They didn’t need it.  They were so good. 

Across the table one of my daughters was eating her carne asada taco, and I quickly plucked a piece of steak from it.  Just the right amount of cilantro, seasoned perfectly.  My god it was good.  I thought about trading her, but I wasn’t going to let anyone eat my food.  I kind of felt territorial.  It was so good, I ordered 2 carne asada tacos to go, wrapped them in foil, and towels hoping they would stay fresh until my wife gets home from Indianapolis.  We’ll see what she thinks.

The service wasn’t bad.  The waitress was VERY friendly and made sure that we had everything we needed.  They are typically only open for lunch during the week and only serve dinner on Fridays. (They use the lunch menu too.)  They are also –NOT- open on weekends.  For us poor working stiffs that stinks.

Overall impression: The food blew me away.  It was inexpensive and had me questioning why I started a stupid diet. 

Plusses: Can we say some of the best food I put in my mouth?  Wait staff was attentive. Prices were awesome.  If I could rate it based on food alone, I would rate it a 5 out of 5.  I loved it.

Minuses: Décor is a little off, no beer, and no soda machine.  YOU NEED TO BE OPEN ON WEEKENDS!!  I NEED MORE!

 ~The Omaha Critic

I tried the margaritas.  Hand crafted, good flavor.  These are a must!

 

I’m sitting here wanting to review The Amazing Pizza Machine with an open heart and mind, but I find myself bashing it over and over again each time I thought about the food.  I have to remember that it’s more than the food, it’s the total experience.  That being said, I will try to be fair and recount my entire experience.

As usual, I was running late at work and my wife and the kids were hungry.  This typically means that I’m not going to be cooking dinner.  The day we visited The Amazing Pizza Machine, the kids were on Spring Break.  We wanted to do something fun and special for them.  Sitting home all week, when my wife took the whole week off of work to be with the kids, we believed, would seriously stink.  So, we tried to plan the entire week for the bunch.  Unfortunately, I couldn’t get the time off. 

We end up going to The Amazing Pizza Machine at 7:35 PM and get “The Amazing Buffet” for the lot of us. We spend some coin on “credits” for their “Entertainment Center” and head for our seat.  This evening, they only had half of the buffet open as they weren’t pushing the numbers through mid week.  That’s fine.  They typically have the buffet duplicated on the other half  to accommodate the crowds.  So I go up and get a salad and we sit in one of the large rooms.  The Flintstones are on the big screen and we start eating.  I figured we would take our time.  Kids didn’t have school the next day and I wanted to unwind from work.  We sit there for a few minutes, and they announce that the buffet will be closing in 20 minutes.  I look over at my wife: “Uhhhh.  We just got here.  We should complain.”  I wasn’t worried.  I figured that was plenty of time to throw down some pizza then head out into the arcade to blow some stuff up.  HA!  I was wrong.  I went up to get some other food, and there were already in process of breaking down the buffet.  Not that I go to this sad excuse of a Valentino’s grand buffet for the food, but I paid for it, don’t put it up until it’s closed.  So, I quickly grab some macaroni and cheese, a piece of crappy pizza and go back to my chair.  As I sit down the bus-person starts grabbing plates off our table.  Part of which, I was still eating off of.  She leaned over our table as if to hurry us along because SHE wanted to go home.  I’m not happy about this, but wanting to have a fun night with the kids, I just let it roll.  I sent one of the kids for Ice cream (Which they hadn’t torn down yet) and dirtied a few more dishes out of spite.

So, dinner being done, we packed up our coats and went into the “Entertainment Center”.  I can’t tell you how much I blew on their redemption games, but I will tell you that they made their money off of my family and I that night.  One thing I did notice however, is that the staff seemed aloof –OR– like they had the desire to be shot.  You know that feeling: “Just shoot me!”  None of them had any interest in being there.  I have seen that place when it just opened.  Everyone had so much energy and excitement.  Every one of the staff seemed happy and energetic.  It was all crazy and new and they seemed to really care what happened.  Now?  Not so much.

I’m not a Valentino’s fan.  I think that their pizza stinks.  Their sauce is gross and their pasta needs something called flavor.  Don’t get me wrong, because they wouldn’t have as many locations as they do if everyone felt the way I do.  I am GLAD that Valentino’s opened The Amazing Pizza Machine.  It’s a great place for kids and families.  I just think that the food stinks and the service is lousy.  There is no pride in the employees anymore.

Plusses – It’s a great place for kids.  Their Salad Bar is always nice and clean.  They always have a decent variety of foods and the kids really seem to like it.

Minuses – The food stinks, the staff seems to hate life, there were several games that were broken and were run down.  The photo-booth didn’t work and I just didn’t feel it.

Overall Impression – Don’t get me wrong.  The place has character.  I am glad that they opened it in Millard.   I just wish that they would pay more attention to the quality of the food and the experience in general.  I fear that if they don’t, that they will lose the business.

~The Omaha Critic

You cannot have lived in Omaha without hearing SOMETHING about the Bohemian Cafe.  Good, bad, or indifferent… someone has said or mentioned it to you some time.  The place is an Omaha Land Mark. (I expect the mayor, with me now having said that, will move to mow it down to put up a new arena style bird watching park or something.)

This is a grand old girl that has been a part of the Omaha experience longer…. Much longer than I have.  

You walk in  to the Bohemian Cafe and immediately you get immersed in the antique bottles on the wall of various types of liquor.  So many varieties of bottles and brews that I lost myself in a vision of old German men in lederhosen sipping these things dry in front of some cottage.  The woodwork on the walls was intricate and screamed craftsmanship and pride.  We were immediately sat and presented with water glasses and then our waiter came and took our drink order.  Off he went.

My wife and I looked around and noticed that there was a real lack of “new blood” in this place.  The clientel was generally older than I would have hoped.  That being said, I guess, I am hoping that some of my readers would re-explore this old-school gem of Omaha culinary fare. 

Soon our drinks arrived and our waiter took our order.  I had the Jaeger Schnitzel and my wife had the Svickova, a Czech Style Sauer Braten.  My wife and I also ordered the liver dumpling soup while the kids had the chicken noodle.  Our waiter was off in a flash, put in our order and came back with bread and butter.  I have to say that typically, I have bad luck with waiters (male) except for at Hiro (HA!  Gotcha Rusty!).  Typically waiters are slow, or talk to much or generally just aren’t attentive to their customers.  I found one that was awesome.  Drinks always full, made no excuses for something wrong, just went and made it right.  He tried to anticipate our needs and made sure that if he could get to us, he sent someone.  I feel bad for not getting his name.  If you go there, it’s the tall guy with the buzz cut hair.

Our soup came out and it was, like I always remembered it.  This absolutely delicious broth with this lead ball of liver dumpling in it.  This thing is so dense that it gives dark matter a run for it’s money.  The thing is soooo good.  I dipped my rye bread into the broth and was in hog heaven.  Not too salty, no intense… it was just right.  (Do I look like Goldilocks?)

After our soup, our main course came out and my Faeger Schnitzel is done to perfection.  What is it you ask?  (From Bohemian Cafe’s Menu:) Why it’s Selected veal steak sautéed in wine sauce and imported herbs, served with mushrooms.  *smacks lips*  it came with “dumplings” and sauerkraut.  I have to say, cooked meat with gravy, no matter what kind of gravy has to be the comfort foods of all comfort foods.  Chicken fried steak… pot roast… stewed chicken… boiled yak with frog gravy.. my god… It just makes me happy… so to get this juggernaught of comfort food placed in front of me, made me so happy. I dug in like a ravenous animal.  It was so good.  The gravy on this meat was so flavorful and when mixed with the meat, sauerkraut, and dumpling.. I thought I was in heaven.  It’s my old world pallet coming through I guess. 

The sauerkraut, was nothing like you get out of a jar or can.  It was creamy and smooth and didn’t have near the bite.  This was a truly savory accompaniment to the plate, and didn’t overpower.  I was quite delighted. 

After dinner we sampled the desserts: Apple Strudel and a Bavarian Kolacky.  I have eaten Strudel before, so this was no stretch… When I bit into the Kolacky though… I thought my mouth was going to jump off my face and get frisky with my dessert.  It was so delicious.  I wanted to stay and have more and more.  Let’s face it.  I REALLY enjoyed my experience.  It was everything I had remembered it being.

Plusses – The service was top notch.  The bathrooms were spotless.  The food was exactly as it should be.  it was fresh and tasty.  The Liver Dumpling soup reminded me of something my grandmother used to make.

Minuses – Location.  This place is on 13th street right between the Zoo and Downtown, so there is no direct interstate access.  Parking is across the street, and the drunk hanging out in the front took away from it a bit.

Overall Impression – This is an Omaha Classic.  This place is our history and needs to be visited time and time again.  Go RE-DISCOVER this gem in the Crown of Omaha!

~The Omaha Critic